Heather Gay

Heather Gay
Born	Heather Jill Deans 6/29/1974
Birthplace	Carmel-by-the-Sea, California, U.S.
Nationality	American
Occupation	Television personality, businesswoman, author
Known for	The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City
Education	Brigham Young University (BA)

Heather Jill Gay (née Deans; born June 29, 1974) is an American television personality, businesswoman, and author who rose to national prominence as a main cast member on Bravo's The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City beginning with its premiere season in 2020. Born into a devout family within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and educated at Brigham Young University, Gay's public departure from the faith and her candid exploration of life after Mormonism became central themes of both her television persona and her literary work. Her 2023 memoir, Bad Mormon, debuted on The New York Times Best Sellers list, offering a frank account of her upbringing, marriage, divorce, and the process of disentangling her identity from the religious community in which she was raised. In addition to her media career, Gay is the founder and owner of Beauty Lab + Laser, a medical spa business based in Salt Lake City, Utah. Her willingness to discuss topics often considered taboo within her former religious community — including divorce, body image, and the social consequences of leaving an insular faith — has made her one of the more distinctive figures within the Real Housewives franchise.

Early Life

Heather Jill Deans was born on June 29, 1974, in Carmel-by-the-Sea, California. She was raised in a devout family belonging to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Her upbringing was deeply rooted in the traditions, expectations, and social structures of the LDS faith, which would later become a defining subject of both her television appearances and her writing.

Gay has spoken extensively about the influence of her Mormon upbringing on her worldview and sense of identity. In interviews and in her memoir, she described growing up with the understanding that her life's purpose was to marry within the faith, raise children in the church, and adhere to the standards set by her religious community. She has described the environment as one in which conformity was both expected and rewarded, and deviation from the prescribed path carried significant social consequences.

Her father, John Deans, was also a member of the LDS Church. The family's adherence to the faith shaped nearly every aspect of Gay's childhood and adolescence, from the social circles in which she moved to the educational path she would eventually pursue. Gay has recalled that within her community, a woman's value was closely tied to her adherence to church teachings, her marriage, and her role as a mother.

These formative experiences would later serve as the foundation for Gay's public narrative. Her willingness to discuss the constraints she felt growing up within the LDS Church, and the personal cost of eventually leaving it, became central to her public identity when she entered the world of reality television.

Education

Gay attended Brigham Young University, the flagship educational institution of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, located in Provo, Utah. She earned a Bachelor of Arts degree from the university. Attending BYU was consistent with the expectations of her family and religious community, where enrollment at the church-affiliated university was considered a natural and encouraged step for young members of the faith. The social environment at BYU, where adherence to an honor code rooted in LDS teachings is required of all students, further reinforced the cultural norms Gay had grown up with. It was during this period that her life continued along the trajectory expected of a devout young Mormon woman.

Career

Beauty Lab + Laser

Prior to her television career, Gay established herself as a businesswoman in Salt Lake City. She is the founder and owner of Beauty Lab + Laser, a medical aesthetics practice offering a range of cosmetic procedures and treatments. The business has been featured prominently on The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and serves as a recurring setting and plot point throughout the series. Beauty Lab + Laser operates in Salt Lake City and provides services including laser treatments, injectables, and other cosmetic procedures.

Gay has discussed how building her business as a divorced woman in a community dominated by the LDS Church presented unique challenges, as her departure from the faith and her divorce placed her outside the traditional social networks that often facilitate business connections in the Salt Lake City area.

The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City

In November 2020, Gay debuted as a main cast member on the first season of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, the Bravo network's expansion of its Real Housewives franchise into Utah. The series, which explores the lives of a group of women living in and around Salt Lake City, was notable for its focus on the unique cultural dynamics of a metropolitan area heavily influenced by the LDS Church.

From the outset, Gay's storyline centered on her identity as a woman who had left the Mormon faith and was navigating life as a divorcée and single mother in a community where both of those statuses carried significant social stigma. Her candid discussions about the emotional toll of her departure from the church, her struggles with self-image, and her efforts to build a new identity outside the faith resonated with viewers and became one of the show's defining narratives.

Gay has appeared on the show continuously since its premiere, remaining a main cast member through multiple seasons. Her relationships with fellow cast members, including Jen Shah, Meredith Marks, Lisa Barlow, and Whitney Rose, have been central to the series' dramatic arcs.

One of the most discussed incidents of Gay's time on the show occurred during Season 3, when she appeared on camera with a prominent black eye, the origin of which became the subject of extensive speculation and a major storyline. Gay addressed the incident in interviews, including with Interview magazine, where she discussed the black eye alongside other topics including her co-star Jen Shah's legal troubles and the process of writing her memoir.

During Season 6 of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, which aired in late 2025 and early 2026, Gay's storylines continued to generate attention. The season featured a crossover charter with the cast of Below Deck Down Under, during which Gay's interactions with Captain Jason Chambers drew media coverage. Chambers addressed rumors of a romance between the two on the Below Deck Down Under After Show, describing their interactions as flirtatious but setting the record straight on the nature of their relationship.

Season 6 also saw continued complexities in Gay's friendships with her castmates, particularly with Meredith Marks, whose rumored conflicts with Gay were reported by entertainment media.

In addition to the main series, Bravo announced a docuseries titled Surviving Mormonism with Heather Gay, further exploring Gay's departure from the LDS Church and the broader experiences of those who have left the faith.

Writing

Gay is the author of two books. Her debut memoir, Bad Mormon, was published by Gallery Books, an imprint of Simon & Schuster, in February 2023. The book chronicles Gay's upbringing within the LDS Church, her marriage and subsequent divorce, and the personal and social consequences of leaving her faith community. In interviews promoting the book, Gay described the memoir as an account of her journey from being what she considered a model Mormon woman to becoming someone her former community would label a "bad Mormon."

Bad Mormon debuted on The New York Times Best Sellers list for hardcover nonfiction in February 2023. The book was widely covered in media, with profiles and reviews appearing in The New York Times, The Cut, Interview magazine, and on NBC's Today show. In her interviews, Gay discussed how the process of writing the memoir forced her to confront painful aspects of her past and examine the ways in which her religious upbringing had shaped her understanding of herself and her place in the world.

Gay's second book, Good Time Girl, was published in December 2024. In an interview with the Los Angeles Times, she discussed the book and her continued evolution beyond the identity she had constructed during her years in the LDS Church.

Personal Life

Gay was previously married to Billy Gay. The couple's marriage was documented in newspaper records. The marriage, which took place within the LDS Church, ended in divorce. Gay has spoken publicly and at length about the impact of her divorce on her life, describing it as a pivotal event that precipitated her departure from the Mormon faith and her reevaluation of the beliefs and social structures she had accepted throughout her life.

Gay is a mother and has discussed her role as a single parent on the show and in interviews. She has been open about the challenges of raising children outside the LDS community after having initially committed to raising them within the faith.

In 2025 and 2026, Gay spoke publicly about her experiences with weight loss and body image. She disclosed that she had lost approximately 30 pounds with the assistance of GLP-1 receptor agonist medications, including Ozempic. In interviews with USA Today, Fox News, Women's Health, and other outlets, Gay discussed the societal double standards she observed regarding weight loss, noting that losing weight changed how people treated her. She stated, "I am done with shame," expressing her desire to speak openly about the use of weight loss medications and the pressures of maintaining a certain appearance as a public figure on television.

Gay also discussed the financial costs of cosmetic procedures and the pressures of looking a certain way on television, sharing details about her spending on plastic surgery and related treatments in an interview with Bustle. Her openness about these topics drew media coverage and public discussion about appearance-related pressures in the entertainment industry.

Recognition

Gay's memoir Bad Mormon achieved commercial success upon its release, appearing on The New York Times Best Sellers list for hardcover nonfiction in its debut week in February 2023. The book received coverage across major media outlets, including The New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, The Cut, NBC's Today show, and Interview magazine.

Her visibility as a cast member on The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City from its first season onward positioned her as one of the franchise's prominent figures. The Salt Lake Tribune profiled her as a notable public figure from the Salt Lake City area, examining her dual identity as a businesswoman and television personality. The same publication covered her departure from the LDS Church as a significant personal and cultural story.

The announcement of Surviving Mormonism with Heather Gay as a standalone Bravo docuseries represented a further expansion of her media presence beyond the ensemble format of the Real Housewives franchise, signaling network confidence in her individual story as a draw for audiences.

Legacy

Gay's public narrative — the journey of a woman raised in a strict religious community who ultimately leaves the faith and rebuilds her life in the public eye — has contributed to broader cultural conversations about religious disaffiliation, particularly from the LDS Church. Her memoir Bad Mormon and her appearances on The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City have provided a high-profile platform for discussing the personal and social costs of leaving insular religious communities. The Salt Lake Tribune and The New York Times both contextualized her story within the larger phenomenon of members departing from the LDS Church and the unique challenges faced by women in that process.

Her forthcoming docuseries Surviving Mormonism with Heather Gay suggests that her personal story has been recognized as representative of a broader experience shared by many former members of the church. By using her platform on reality television and in publishing to discuss topics such as divorce, faith transition, body image, and the pressures of public life, Gay has occupied a distinctive niche within the reality television landscape.

Her openness about the use of GLP-1 medications for weight loss and her discussions of the financial and emotional costs of cosmetic procedures have also contributed to public discourse around body image, the pressures faced by women in the entertainment industry, and the societal reactions to women's choices about their own bodies.